LAGOS BAD BOY!! The Story Of A Renowned Yahoo Boy [A Must Read]

THRILLER

You will never know the privileges you enjoy as a student until you find yourself outside the walls of that university.

The parties, the visits, the fun, all of them gone; vanished into thin air and you are faced with the hardship of the Nigerian society.

Imagine yourself in my shoes, three years after graduation and I cannot be said to have achieved anything, nothing worthwhile. No job, no food, no clothes, I even squat

I don’t think you understand the kind of pressure that I feel. The frustration is much, too much that it can kill a man. That was my story until I met Tunde a.k.a TundeFundz.

Tunde was a Yoruba demon, the kind that take believers to heaven; I mean heaven on earth. He was the guy that introduced me to the business, he made me a Lagos Bad Boy.

EPISODE ONE:- MEETING TUNDEFUNDZ

I met Tunde through Junior, the guy I used to squat with. Like me, Junior was a graduate. We had met in one of the parties back in the Uni.

Back then he was a university celebrity, and he was to perform in that party. But it happened that he had some disagreement with the organizers, they had refused to give him his balance saying his performance wasn’t worth the original price which they had agreed to pay him.

I sat at a corner watching them argue, I knew they wanted to cheat him; they had planned to play him and if possible beat him up because he came alone. So I walked up to them and introduced myself as Junior’s manager.

I told them I knew their plan and that the police was on their way to crash their party and to arrest them as well.

“It’s either you give us the balance or you pay it at the police station,” I threatened. With the seriousness I exhibited, you’d really think I was his manager

At the end of the day, they paid the balance and we resolved the whole issue; and that was how I became Junior’s manager and friend.

Junior was an Eko boy, he was born and brought up in Lagos unlike my sorry Igbo self. But when we finished our NYSC, I went over to Lagos to join him in the struggle to conquer poverty; and that was how I started squatting with him.

We lived from hand to mouth, managing every penny that found its way into our hands until that day, the very day I received the phone call that changed our lives.

That day, I was at a viewing centre around Ayilara Street watching a football march; the date was 28th May, 2016. It was actually a Champions League final between Real Madrid and Atletico Madrid, two spanish teams.

The viewing centre was a buzzing mirror, the reflection of the event playing out in the world famous San Siro Stadium in Milan, when my phone vibrated in my pocket.

I was so focused on the match, I wanted Athletico to win that I didn’t care to answer the call but for the persistent vibration of the phone in my pocket.

I checked and it was Junior, so I went outside to answer.

“Ekene why you no dey pick your call na? Where you dey?”

“I dey watch match for that viewing centre, the regular one na” Just then a roar erupted from the viewing centre, one of the teams had scored.

“I dey come pick you…”

“Junior, I never finish the match ni. This thing na Champions League.” I explained.

“You think say I no for like dey there? I know say today na Champions League but we come Lagos come chase money. You have to choose between that match and chasing money,” Junior lectured.

“Oya na, I dey wait for you. Where…” I tried asking him where we were going to but he had already hung the call. I stood there wondering what he meant by ‘he is coming to pick me’.

Junior didn’t have a ride, not a wheelbarrow, not a bike and not even a car. ‘So what is he coming to pick me with?’

I went closer and peeped inside the viewing centre. The score was 1:0.

“Bros na who score?” I asked one randomly bearded dude. He sighed and said it was Sergio Ramos.

“Na offside sha,” he added.

I knew it!

I was still mourning that goal when a car pulled over in front the viewing centre. This was a Chevrolet Camaro, “the owner must have made it big, maybe one of these politicians”, I told myself.

But the person who stepped out of that car woke me up from my thoughts, it was Junior. I stood there watching in awe as Junior walked up to me.

“Junior what’s up?” I asked pointing at the car.

“Na my guy get am,” he said with all smiles. “Come make I introduce you give am.

“I followed him wondering which of his guys I haven’t met before. I was so close to Junior that I knew all his friends, but maybe not this one.

“Tunde meet my best friend, my manager and roommate,” Junior said smiling. “Plus he’s actually squatting in my house.”

“Fool,” I cursed him and we all laughed.

“Ekene meet Tunde AKA TundeFundz, brotherly he has hammered and he has promised to show us the way.” That was the killer, you said whaaaat? I didn’t know what to do.

“You’re joking right?”

“It is only a fool that jokes when life is joking with his life. Bro. we’ve suffered, wetin we never do for this Lagos.” Tears rolled down my eyes, everything started flashing back.

All the memories, all the sufferings, all the trials and failures. It was as though someone was playing my film for me.

“Junior tell your guy make him no dey cry like pikin o, we are now grown men. I tell you say I go introduce you to the team.”

“Goooaaal!” Another roar of jubilation exploded from the viewing centre but I was not interested anymore.

Tunde got a call and suggested that we leave to a different rendezvous, so we hopped in and drove out.

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